Will Hines Dot Net

I almost peed on my cat’s head just now. Long story. Actually, it’s a short story, but it’s more interesting to leave it unexplained. Maybe.

Recently, I daydreamed if Kevin and I had directed the Spider-Man movie — what extras would we have included on the DVD? I decided that I would include a montage of my favorite Spider-Man comics, and also a feature in which I would give a “tour” of a single issue of Spider-Man and describe what was important about it. It’s during thoughts like these that I’m usually approached by a friend asking “What are you thinking about?” and I respond: “Nothing.”

Today, I also daydreamed that instead of being born in Ohio, I was born in Kiev and I had by this age been elected President of Russia and introduced baseball to my citizens. I decided that when visiting America I would demand a free ticket to Fenway Park, and the Red Sox would beat the Mariners 4-2 on that day. It wasn’t much about how I would lead Russia.

I’m being paid $500 to build a sweepstakes entry form for a gay cruise line.

Driving from Brooklyn to Queens, smoke started seeping out from under the hood of my car. It’s a 1987 Honda with 190,000 miles so it’s not THAT crazy. But I just replaced the radiator last month, and I can smell antifreeze leaking/burning AGAIN. I don’t mind a broken-down car. But it would be nice if it would not REPEAT itself so much.

Wasn’t “Honda” one of the names of the easy opponents on Punch-Out?

Just watched the final act of The Iron Giant with Kevin. Why that movie didn’t blow the lid off the box office when it was out is beyond me. The Giant is hilarious, the Giant is brave, the Giant is beautifully drawn. That’s one of my favorite movies, easily.

I first saw it because Kevin and I were walking around Union Square and we saw that it was playing (this was back whenever it was out, I guess in 1999 or whenever). I hadn’t heard of it but Kevin had read on all his geek message boards (unlike his older brother’s wicked cool BLOG) that it was great. So we went in to see it and both fell in love with it. We were lucky to catch it on the big screen. You can take your Doors concerts that you were lucky enough to see in New Haven. You can have your Woodstock II, when you all got muddy with Green Day or whoever. I got to see The Iron Giant in theaters. So I win.

And Pixar were geniuses for getting Brad Bird to make The Incredibles for them.

Just finished watching Spider-Man 2 on DVD. Man, I love that movie.

I am ready at this moment to fight crime whereever it should raise its ugly head.

My cats have the worst breath I could ever imagine. I never knew this since they used to be so scared of me. Now they crawl all over me, breathing the most horrific odor I can imagine onto my face. Their little kitten mouths smell like a cursed crypt. I still like them, but I have to wonder now if they are in fact zombie kittens breathing undead carbon dioxide into my apartment.

Whoa, I just read a bit online and it seems that bad breath is often a sign of a serious problem, or at least dental disease. Harumph. Could be another adventure to the vet’s office for Hopey and Maggie and their soon-to-be-seen-by-them-as-cruel owner Will Hines.

I’ve upgraded my blog software from WordPress 1.2 to WordPress 1.5.

Just let that sit a moment.

Wow. He upgraded his blog software.

I know! It’s big. It’s probably the most exciting sentence you’ve read all day.

But anyway, I did.

For those who are interested in this sort of thing: I really like WordPress for reasons that I think you have to be a computer programmer to feel. It’s not that there’s anything wrong with Moveable Type or anything else I’ve run into. But WordPress’ web page is clean and organized. They use a minimal of code and HTML in everything they do. They give plenty of white space in their adminstration screens. I like their mantra “Code is Poetry.” It feels like a smart bunch of muscians got together and launched a record label because they love not just the music, but liner notes and bonus tracks.

But the downside is that the whole WordPress pacakage is getting too complicated in an effort to be all things to all people. Yeah, you CAN use it in a simple way, but all the documentation is geared for the user who wants to use WordPress to run his/her whole site, so if you want a nice simple blog that just lets you update a “what’s new” section of your site — WP is no longer that.

I like them, so I don’t mind wading through the new setup and forcing my customizations into their default setup. Took me a few hours to figure out how to set it up so I could have my index.php page either be a blog, or show my interior pages.

I MIGHT just give up and let WordPress run my whole site. My whole site isn’t that complicated anyway, and it might make sense to delegate it all to a software package that I like, anyway. Hmm. We’ll see.

You, the reader, can’t see most of the changes from this upgrade since I’m not really using any. But this screen I’m using right this second to type in my new post! Well, it’s cleaner and nice. You’ll have to trust me on that.

Final day of the painstakingly humorless 7-day recap of my days:

• Did a scene in Margot’s short film. The ubiquitous Rob Lathan was starring. Very fun.
• Went to Terry’s to edit Fun Squad. We got 80% done. Or maybe 95%, depending on whether we put in a final segment, which I think we will. Because the short film took less time than I expected, I got to Terry’s early, and went to a nearby cafe to draw the Fun Squad cartoon. I’m proud to say I did not break the show’s tradition of crappy stilted jerky animation.
• Subbed a class for Gethard. I felt harsh, but it was fun.
• Took the class out for a drink. My teaching skills are still to be determined, but my drive to recreate a drinking scene at McManus are unparalleled.

• Searched for and found sound effects and music cues for Fun Squad 2 and Kerry On.
• Brian arrived for Kev’s birthday.
• Brian and I went to the Tenth Street Russian Baths. We sweat. I drank 2 liters of water. Liters? Litres?
• Dinner with 30th Birthday Boy Kevin Hines at Paul’s burger joint near St. Mark’s. We met there for his 29th also. It’s a tradition now. The Hines Boys respect tradition, unless it’s hard to do so.
• Accompanied Kevin to his birthday bash at ACE bar, which has now hosted birthday parties for Will 30, and Will 31, Kevin 29 and Kevin 30. It’s the Official Bar of Hines Non-Birthday Party Planning.
• Brian and I got for Kevin: Special Edition Iron Giant DVD, Gwen Stefani CD, A framed photo of Ted Williams, a framed photo of the Red Sox piling on the mound after winning the World Series last year and a check to pay for a year of Time Warner Tivo (DVR).
• Came home. Typed this.

We are so close. Man, it is so hard to take these entries, which start out with so much humor and cleverness — and then edit them down to just the boring facts. I’ll be glad when this week is over.

• Shot more Fun Squad II — final sequence. Also the final shot for the Kerry pilot, also. Lots of shooting this month, and still all the editing to go!
• Dinner with Terry at a chinese place in the Village.
• Home to clean up.
• Monkeydick show at 11pm. Very fun.
• McManus with Colton, Eugene, DeCoster and Zach.

How much dry summary can you take, Internet? Well, let’s just see…

• Installed some php scripts I’d written for Chuck.
• Met with Skinner about her one-person show. It’s going to be funny.
• Met with Krista to go see The Gates. Saw them.
• Had dinner at Eatery, one of my favoritely-named places.
• Taught session 3 of my first Level 101 UCBT class. Good times.
• Went out drinking with the 101 class. What’s a 101 class without post-class drinking? It’s not a class, that’s what.
• Lost my iPod headphones somewhere today. What a drag.

Now I’m home.