willhines.net

I forgot to mention this about Gosport in the Gosport post:

When going through security in LaGuardia to fly to Indiana, security pulled my bag out of the scanner for close inspection. And why was that? Because the x-ray machine’s pictures of my bag were obscured BY ALL THE CAT HAIR ON MY BAG.

Apparently, I’ve descended into such a state of physical repulsiveness that my luggage is coated in cat hair to the point where an X-Ray machine — a machine designed to see through walls — cannot penetrate. I was disgusted with myself with an intensity I have never felt, and I’m a guy who once woke up to find myself picking my nose in my sleep.

On a separate note, [...]

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Some of you are obsessed with my kittens. Some of you like to pretend to be obsessed with my kittens. On the other hand, some of you are feeling a backlash of resentment against people obsessed with my kittens. And still others are feeling a backlash of resentment against the people pretending to be obsessed with my kittens.

Where you end up on this issue is up to you. What I do know — that is to say what is TRUE — is that there is a kitten available for adoption. She is a direct sibling of my kittens — a sister, who eluded capture when my kittens were captured. That means she’s 11 months old. She was caught recently [...]

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People say to me: “Love the stories of thievery, but how about some plugs for all this comedy nonsense you’re involved with?”

Well, here you go. My sketch group Game Face has new show debut this weekend at Sketchfest NYC. Here are the salient details: 1) It’s called “Church of Positivitology.” 2) It stars me, Neil Casey, Rob Lathan, Mitch Magee and Joe Wengert. 3) There are fleeting references to both Top Gun and Good Will Hunting in this show. Check it out, please.

Details:
Game Face: Church of Positivitology
Saturday June 11, midnight
UCB Theatre
307 W. 26th Street
(btwn. 8th & 9th Aves.)

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Be soothed, Internet: My blog is once again showing what songs my iTunes is currently playing. I’m sure this is a relief to families all over America and the world beyond.

It’s actually cool how this is working. Both my PC and my iMac upload text files to my web server when iTunes is playing. (I use Kung-Tunes on my iMac and Now Playing on my PC.) My blog checks which file is more recent and displays the info from it. So whichever computer I use to play music, the blog display that machine’s info. That’s cool, right?

When I am old, I will look back on my life and wonder “What did I do with all my time?” [...]

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Thanks to everyone who offered support and condolences about my iPod being stolen. I was angry all the next day, but now with 3 days behind me I’m realizing that it’s just a glorified walkman, albeit an expensive one. As most people who spoke to/emailed me understood, it was more the shock of having something stolen out of my hands that angered me than the actual material loss.

Since then, I’m still watching the subways carefully. Few people have their iPods out on the subway. They either know better or it’s just good luck for them that they don’t feel the need to constantly fiddle with it. I did see one guy with his iPod sitting in his shirt pocket [...]

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Well, fate has delivered a way for me to stop listening to my iPod so much — it was stolen right out of my hands on the subway yesterday.

Many people have mentioned to me in conversation that they hear that stealing iPods on the subway is becoming more common. But I wasn’t thinking about that yesterday, when I took my iPod out of my pocket to switch songs while the N train pulled into 39th Avenue in Queens. I was sitting right by the door and holding the iPod up so I could see the screen — in retrospect, almost perfect position for someone who wanted to snatch it. Someone did — tall, skinny kid (looked under 20 to me) [...]

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Free-lance work is slowing down, and my body is simultaneously collapsing. It’s just ALWAYS TIRED. I’m exhausted even as I type this. AND I’ve been more stupid than usual. Last night I ran to the subway (7 blocks from my apartment) to go to a class I was teaching only to realize I’d left my cell phone. I felt like I had time, just, so I ran back to get it. 14 blocks later, upon returning to the subway I realized I had also forgotten my WALLET. So I made another return trip, then boarded the train. Maybe I’m tired from all the unnecessary running.

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