Happy Father’s Day to Jerome Bradford Hines:
That kinda looks like an oddly-square set of underpants. It’s actually a trash bag, captured here because on Christmas my father’s OCD requires him to discard all wrappings as soon as they hit the floor. I think he gets more satisfaction from throwing out those wrappings then he does receiving the presents.
Random facts about my father:
- Grew up in Cleveland, Ohio. Remains a die-hard Browns fan.
- Spent most of his career negotiating contracts for an aerospace technology company. Today he’s an aide to special education teachers in Westport.
- To my memory, could not bear to intentionally lose any board game.
- Is a decent painter.
- Owns a nice house in Wilton, Ct with his girlfriend Lori. Today he finished painting one of the bedrooms.
- Prefers orange soda to all other sodas.
- Every now and then, has to do things like this:
On my iTunes now:
Child Star by The Unicorns from "Who Will Cut Our Hair When We're Gone?"
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Jun 17th, 2007 at 12:05 pm
Not only does he refuse to lose, he will cheat to win. Sorry Dad… it had to be said.
Jun 17th, 2007 at 3:28 pm
Your dad sounds like my dad. He makes piles of stuff all over the house in the name of “order.”
Jun 17th, 2007 at 3:29 pm
Incidentally, would it kill you Hineses to tuck in your damned shirts? Jesus.
Jun 17th, 2007 at 6:56 pm
Orange Soda and Cleveland? Your dad is alright by me.
(Harvey Pekar of Cleveland-based comic American Splendor loves orange soda as well. Weird.)
-Terry
Jun 18th, 2007 at 9:14 am
Don’t listen to Dyna. Tucking is for losers! Let your shirttails fly free Hineses!
Jun 19th, 2007 at 8:45 am
Coincidentally, I also prefer orange soda AND fathered a kid named Will Hines.
Jun 19th, 2007 at 9:58 am
my dad has had a disturbing love affair with orange crush my whole life. he would get so excited if we saw it out at some general store during our many painful road trips in my youth. but orange crush is pretty effing good, so i guess he’s not THAT crazy.
Jun 23rd, 2007 at 4:30 pm
I bought some orange Fanta at the grocery store today because of this post. (Not because of the alluring “Fantanas”.)
-Terry