willhines.net

Todd Sentz sent me this hilarious video called “Jake E. Lee Shreds” — it took me a bit to get it, but then I couldn’t stop laughing. The clapping by Ozzy is genius.

Also, this video of Michael Conley’s dribbling warmup is awesome in a completely non-ironic way (via Kottke.org).

| Tags: videos

When my subway arrives at the Rockefeller Center stop each morning I hear the train conductor make an announcement something like this “Now arriving Rockefeller Center, transfer to the B,D,F,V; Top of the Rock.”

“Top of the Rock?” I know what that is — that’s where you can buy a ticket and go to the top of Rockefeller Center and take in the view of NYC. It is a classic Tall Thing to Climb — great for the many tourists who mill around Rockefeller Center hoping to see Al Roker. But how did they get it so that the MTA is advertising for them? That’s such odd product placement. They don’t mention Central Park, or MoMA, or [...]

| Tags: nyc, subways

Brian and I call short haircuts “honest” because they reveal how far your hair has receded. He emailed me a few weeks ago to tell me that he had given himself the most honest haircut he had ever received. The email had a photo attached which showed his skull nearly but not quite shaved — indeed, the most sincere I had ever seen his hair. I responded that my hair could stand to be a bit more truthful. So I went to Astor Place and thumped down the stairs and had them clipper my hair to a decently genuine shortness. It’s jarring to have your hair cut shorter, but it does feel clean and neat.

| Tags: aging, brian

Basically, putting a friend on hold continually is perpetually fun. It went like this when my brother phoned me last week.

(phone rings)
Me: “Hello, this is Will.”
Kevin: “Hi, it’s me.”
Me: “Are you looking for Will Hines?”
Kevin: “Um, yes.”
Me: “One second.” (hold button) “Hello?”
Kevin: (resigned tone) “Yes, I’m looking for Will.”
Me: “Great. Hold on, please.” (hold button) “Hello?”
Kevin: “Will?”
Me: “You’re looking for Will Hines? One second.” (hold)

You need a tolerant friend on the other line, but I think that stays fun forever.

This blog is ridiculous.

| Tags: annoying

Everyone at work is searching YouTube for “taser videos” now. Another popular search topic: wedding fights.

| Tags: videos

That is the music video for the Elvis Costello song “The Only Flame In Town.” Among the many things disturbing and uncomfortable about this video:

• The saxophone
• The presence of Darryl Hall
• The idea that any women would be excited about winning a date with Elvis Costello or the Attractions. I mean, some women would. But not the women hired to be in this video.
• The terrible acting of each of The Attractions when presented with his date.
• The idea of doing a video for this song at all, because this song is a terrible, super-80s version of what otherwise might be a Good [...]

| Tags: elvis costello, music, videos, words

The following video is in Matt DeCoster’s and my sketch show Seven Fights:

Seven Fights is up this Saturday the 15th at 7:30pm at UCBT. Think about it! We’re up with Rob Latham’s Get Psyched.

| Tags: decoster, sketch, videos

In my car on the V train, heading into Rockefeller Center, people were reading the following books:

• Cathedral by Raymond Carver
• The Naked Civil Servant by Quentin Crisp
• The Diary of Peter Ginz
• Love and War by John Jakes
• Acres of Diamonds: The Russell Conwell Story by Gregory A. Dixon and Russell H. Conwell

Pretty literate group overall. It’s fun to do this but I’m probably going to stop. It’s hard to identify what everyone’s reading without lurking. To identify The Naked Civil Servant, I had to stand right next to the girl reading it. Right as I was thinking “I bet I should not be doing this,” some older guy by the door [...]

| Tags: books, nyc, subways

Today on the subway in, I saw people reading the following books:

• One Man’s Meat by E.B. White
• Baby Laughs by Jenny McCarthy (why?)
• V for Vendetta by Alan Moore/David Lloyd
• On the Road by Jack Kerouac
• Miles by Miles Davis

If I remember I’ll take more careful note tomorrow. I remember a few weeks ago, right after the last Harry Potter book came out, I saw FIVE different people reading that book on one subway car. Amazing.

| Tags: books, nyc, subways

The workmen have come to my apartment for the past four Saturdays. In that time they repaired the leak in my ceiling and replaced the soggy rotten tiles with bright white ones. They replaced the buckled section of the kitchen floor. The repainted my bathroom, and re-spackled (or re-glued or something) the creases in between the tiles along its walls. The replaced my shaky doorknob. They determined that my refrigerator had a leak and told my landlord to get me a new one. The place looks great!

A tiny wrinkle: I have no idea if they’re showing up this Saturday. I’d really like to sleep in, but when they show up they show up at 8:30am on the dot. The price [...]

| Tags: apartment