Will Hines Dot Net

Hey, it’s a new episode of The Line! And for one second I look ridiculous in it! Check it out!

I just watched a stand-up clip of Maria Bamford on the Comedy Central blog and thought it was funny. Then I realized I had barely heard of her (which is no comment on her, I haven’t had cable in years and don’t know anything that didn’t happen in the pages of Watchmen). So I read her Wikipedia page and realized she and I were born on the exact same day (Sept. 3, 1970). I also found out the ebay was founded on my 25th birthday, and that when I turned 6 the Viking spacecraft landed on Mars. So who is this person? Who am I? Should I be successful?

Indie Cup. Another UCBT-NY original. Directed by Nick “Awkward Boy” Paley. Written by Caitlin Tegart. Starring Scott Coulander, Emily Strachan, Ben Rodgers, Craig Rowin, and Rory Panagotopulos. Originally done by Stone Cold Fox at Maude Night.

Three unrelated things for you:

1) The baby from the cover of Nevermind is a 17-year-old fan of techno who hates authority and thinks teens his age don’t get it. Uh, that’s awesome. (via allmusic.com)

2) Here’s the home demo Michael Jackson made of “Workin’ Day and Night” that he brought to Quincy Jones when they made Off the Wall. It’s he, Randy and Janet in 1978 pounding on bottles, playing keyboard and bass. It is awesome.

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3) Don’t Cry For Me, I’m Already Dead is a weird but good 12 page online comic that will break your heart. [thx ptolemy]

Sexy Screenname. So this was a sketch at Maude Night two weeks ago, and I enjoyed it, and so the cast, author and I decided to video record it and here it is. Written by Rob Cacy. Starring Matt Evans, featuring the voice of Kristy Webb. Kristy was actually standing just off camera, doing her lines live into a microphone. That’s interesting, right?

Also, episode two of The Line is up. Gavin and I speak!

Brothers Hines, 1983

Brothers Hines tonight! Come see some wry and adorable comedy! See us bald and mope before your VERY EYES! We perform at 11pm with the super-awesome Hot Sauce!

The Line, a web series which stars Bill Hader and Joe Lo Truglio (co-written by Hader and Simon Rich, directed by Seth Myers), but with supporting roles from the people you see above — debuted today on crackle.com. it’s about a bunch of nerds waiting in line for 11 days to see a sci-fi movie (“FutureSpace”). Will Hines and Gavin Speiller fans will have to wait until episode two to see us (beyond flashes of us in the pre-credits teaser) but you can see Gethard, Moynihan and Thomas MIddleditch in episode uno right now.

Here’s a short and cool essay about Stan Musial, the St. Louis Cardinal outfielder who is one of the best baseball players of all time and rarely talked about. He was also famously nice and generous. The opening story about how he was never once thrown out of a game is amazing all by itself. I found it through Rob Neyer’s ESPN blog.

I always want to believe that famous people — actors, atheletes, authors — are “nice.” I don’t know why, but I do. And it’s a relief to learn that sometimes these people in all likelihood were really just genuinely nice people.

This happened a few months ago, but it’s funny so I’m posting about it now anyway.

Tabitha works at Spring Street Natural, so I met her there after her shift one Saturday afternoon. We decided we wanted coffee, and Balthazar is right next door to her restaurant. Despite being a snobby place for paparazzi-hungry celebrities, Balthazar also has pretty cheap and good coffee available to go, so we got two cups. We were going to Terry Jinn’s to watch Battlestar Galactica, and decided that we should bring something, and realized that Dean and Deluca was on the corner, so we got cookies there. Then we wanted a crossword puzzle, so we picked up a New York Times and got on the R train. Suddenly we realized what we looked like: two people carrying Balthazar coffee, Dean & Deluca bags, a New York Times — one of whom is a late 30s wanna be hipster wearing retro glasses and the other is his asian girlfriend. One of us was probably listening to an iPod nano. We were suddenly and without warning the biggest douchebags in New York City.

But maybe we actually ARE douchebags! That’s the scary part. I mean, we bought all those things on purpose. I prefer the theory that if you spend more than half an hour in Soho, you just sorta become an asshole without meaning to. You accidentally become a douche. We acci-douched. That is what we did.

The 10 Mental Illnessess Batman Clearly Has. Fear of clowns is number one.

Via Journalista