Juno in Juneau
by Will
Finished editing the above Charlie Sanders sketch “Second Fattest Man In The World” (or “Charles Pottamus”) — a tour de force on stage which he and I have deliberately turned into a weird moody art piece! It’s like Orson Welles if Orson Welles ranted about the IHOP Tremendous Twelve. Charlie doing his “eating” noise of “yaminy yaminy” (at 3:10) is one of the most ridiculous sounds — please check it out.
I’m in a hotel in Minneapolis, waiting for the RNC to begin. I miss being home, but being in a hotel a lot is kinda cool — it’s like being at the world’s richest college! Having nothing to do, I’ve been reading obsessively about the campaign and now know more than I ever thought I could know about current political issues.
I’ve even been reading the crazier political conspiracy blogs and am for-real convinced that Republican V.P. nominees Sarah Palin is not the mother of her fifth child — I believe it belongs to her daughter. I have no evidence for this belief but since when does anyone demand facts to support their opinions about political figures? EVEN IF THIS IS TRUE, I think Palin is a genius pick for McCain (not because she’s a woman, but because she’s a pro-life, pro-gun, folksy-talkin’ church-going Alaskan cowboy) and will help him as much as any vice-presidential pick can.
My hotel is right by the Mall of American so I went. It is indeed huge. I didn’t notice it until I got completely lost and accidentally stumbled upon an aquarium with sharks.
I am listening to the late 70s/early 80s Scottish band Orange Juice, which was the former band of Edwyn Collins, who you know as the guy who did the song “A Girl Like You” (“I’ve never known a girl like you before…”) in 1994. Orange Juice is great! The Smiths before the Smiths. I will post the great song “Dying Day”… later!
Tabitha is beating the crap out of me in Scrabulous. We were evenly matched when it was on Facebook, but now that we are playing the “by email” version she’s pummeling. Tabitha is smarter/more powerful/inspired over email? Or am I dumber?
I’ve been reading so many gossipy political blogs that I bought the biography of John Adams by David McCollough to make myself feel smart and principled. I read 10 pages and then went back to listening to Orange Juice.
I find my title for this blog post amazingly clever and am hoping it isn’t already a played-out joke.
Comments
Nice threads.
“A meteor full of hollandaise sauce.”
Awesome.
That was a pretty short blurb about Palin. Doesn’t it seem odd that McCain publicly spoke against having a woman as President and then a few months later he picks Palin for his VP? I feel like it is less about the fact that she is capable and more about the fact that she can bring the female vote.
That being said, this is only bothersome to me because of the circumstances. Had he been supportive of the notion of a woman in office, his choice would have been welcomed by me.
“Mall of American” haha.
Dan, I’m not really that into politics. There are so many rants about the candidates out there that I’m not into saying more than necessary to convey my experience covering these conventions.
But for you: It doesn’t seem odd that McCain switched because a) ALL politicians switch — Bill Clinton spent months slamming Obama only to enthusiastically endorse him after his wife is out of the race and b) McCain slammed Hillary in particular, not women in general — so to embrace another woman isn’t much of a flip-flop.
The real question is: why is he embracing someone with very little experience when that seemed to be one of his main attacks against Obama. My answer to that question is he gains enough by picking a very pro-life, pro-gun, pro-oil running mate who is very much NOT “more of the same” that it’s worth losing his “no experience” attack. Seems like a really smart pick to me for McCain.
I think that i have gotten pulled into the teeth gnashing arena of politics. Honestly i feel that i have been tricked into focusing on small things instead of focusing on the possible outcome. You are right about McCain gaining more then he loses. And that is truthfully all that matters. The real lenses that we as Americans should be seeing things through are “how events and choices with effect us” and “How events and choices will effect our nation” His flip flopping might be annoying but in the end it has no effect on the outcome. It all comes down to the finale choice. And you are right, she is a good choice for his campaign.
I’ve just been taking advantage of your busyness. I’m pretty sure you’ll start laying down the bingos again when you get back.
The speculation about Palin’s daughter being the baby’s mother that I’ve read (I think the main source is some random kos blog) really left a bad taste in my mouth, if for no other reason than that they had 3 different pictures of the daughter showing differences in her belly size. Really? Is it really ok to be on “bump watch” (ie, closely examining her body) for a teenage daughter of a politician? It doesn’t make a difference to me that she actually is pregnant, the pictures were all old and probably pre-pregnancy anyway. Maybe I’m just bitter because according to people like that, I’ve been 4 months pregnant for the past 9 years. Oh well- I still think it’s gross.
I enjoyed Obama’s response: “I have said before and I will repeat again: People’s families are off limits. And people’s children are especially off-limits. This shouldn’t be part of our politics. It has no relevance to Gov. Palin’s performance as a governor or her potential performance as a vice president. So I would strongly urge people to back off these kinds of stories. You know my mother had me when she was 18 and how a family deals with issues and teenage children, that shouldn’t be a topic of our politics.”
on a less bitter note- I used to work at B&N and got Paul Giamatti to sign the John Adams bio (which had PG on the cover, as promo for the HBO series) “Paul Giamatti as John Adams.” I thought it was hilarious. (still do)
that is one of my favorite sketches ever.
i agree that palin will help mccain with the far right extremists because of her stances on those issues.
i have been to minneapolis and was pleasantly surprised at how much i liked it, but was super disappointed that i didn’t get to see the mall of america.
I like the title “Juno in Juneau”. I’m sure there will be thousands of “Juno/Juneau” parodies in the next few weeks. But I’ll know I heard it first on Will Hines blog! That’s where I get most of my news! Actually, for real, this is where I’m getting most of my convention scoop. Digging it!
I can’t stop watching “2nd Fattest….”
this was a ….smorgasbord orgasborg of a post!
I immediately was admiring of your blog post title.