Will Hines Dot Net

I think I’m going to start tumbling. I feel left out.

Probably gonna be a bunch of improv bullshit.

Lanny’s Ex-Wife Cheryl. Rob and I got our old UCBT compadres to be in our show at the LA theatre. Jessica St. Clair played Lanny’s ex-wife Cheryl. Jessica took classes at the same time as Rob and I. I love that she almost breaks here after saying “lasers.” The whole Get Psyched LA show is broken into chapters on YouTube. See St. Clair, Jackie Clarke, Nate Shelkey, Sean Clements, Paul Scheer and Ed Helms. And me. And Rob Lathan.

Buy our book from me in person for TEN BUCKS! Or online for 12 (includes shipping cost) at http://www.getpsyched.biz.

Do you guys remember how Rob Lathan and I wrote a book called Get Psyched!? Weird, right? Well we did and we have TWO readings for it this week — one Thursday and one Saturday!

1) Thursday Feb. 18 at 7:30pm at Greenlight Bookstore in Fort Greene, Brooklyn! 686 Fulton Street! With Edith Zimmerman and Elan Baker. We will be there as part of the monthly literary humor show STEAMBOAT hosted by the Bob Powers who is as wry as shit!

2) Saturday 8pm at The Creek! Get Psyched Live! Rob and I and a bunch of other hilarious people read from the book!

Come buy our book! TEN [...]

First of all, it’s nobody’s fault but my own that Tabitha and I went to Bermuda at the worst possible time of year. Jet Blue had a one day sale on airline tickets in November and I thought to myself “Hey Will, you never take vacations — you need to just kinda make that happen.” That I still listen to my frontal lobe is evidence of my eventual destruction. Here’s things I honestly did not know about Bermuda until we landed at the airport:

• It is not the Bahamas.
• It is not that far south! It’s even with like North Carolina. NORTH Carolina!
• It’s super-British! Everyone drives on the left and there’s pictures of the Queen like nobody’s business.
• Meals [...]

So what is this book about anyway? Hey, why don’t you hear a short excerpt? Here’s Lanny reading from Step 7: Get Psyched.

Look at that: it’s a real book!

Answer any or all:

• I want a better profile pic for my twitter. What should I do?
• In the book version of Let The Right One In, the vampire Eli describes once meeting an older vampire and asking why there weren’t more of them? The older vampire answers, and then points at Eli’s chest and coyly suggests something I do not understand. Explain that.
• Is it harder and harder to feel like one knows the current music scene, or is it just something all aging hipsters like myself feel?
• Is it okay if I describe myself as an aging hipster?
• I have eight unspoken for ISBNs and I’m going to use them to publish books by me and my friends. No question here, but if [...]

If you’re not reading Roger Ebert’s blog, you are missing out. Latest entry is on the joys of making out, especially in the context of the sexually repressed college campuses of 1960. Unguarded, honest, plainly stated — it’s a jewel, I say! A jewel!

His previous entry Nil By Mouth — in which he answers the question of whether he misses eating and drinking since jaw surgery took those things away — is heartbreaking and hopeful. Hooray Roger Ebert!

I had reserved a compact but the clerk gave me a convertible Mustang for the same price. I think this happens to many people when they come to L.A. but I’m still gonna pretend that I am Fate’s favorite person. I look ridiculous in this car.

Tell us to take a sarcastic picture and it comes out better then our “real” pictures.

I was going to write “a new checking account” in the title but I feel like that will attract spam commenters.

Anyway, I have Citibank, which used to require not that much minimum balance in order to forgo monthly fees. Post-economic collapse and they require a $6000 combined balance to forgo monthly fees. Too much monthly fee! So I’m going to switch banks. If you love your bank please tell me. Online bill payment a must.

Man, I am seriously inviting spam. It’d be worse if I was asking for a dick enlarging mortgage rate online pharmacy. And now I will be banned by my own spam filter software.