"I'VE BEEN LYING TO YOU FOR THREE DAYS AND NOW YOU'RE SCREWING ME!!!!" There are not many people on the planet more spiteful than George Costanza. His anger is most clearly seen when he is caught in a lie. His existence as a fictional character is surely what allows him such excesses. Or so you would think. As it turns out, George is not the only one among us who breaks the rules and becomes outraged and indignant when they are caught.

Surprised with their pants down, Iraq is fighting back with that which is closest at hand. Spread over the potato fields of Idaho, it should allow Burger King to give out free fries for the rest of 1998. Iraq has protested that UN arms inspectors have been checking on whether Iraq has been eavesdropping on inspectors' operations. Iraq was also incensed that the inspectors had been following up on reports concerning whether prisoners have been used to test chemical and biological weapons. Iraqi Foreign Minister Tariq Aziz in replying to these charges protested "Never, never it is a sheer lie." It's never the big test that gets you, it's those unannounced pop quizzes. As annoying this behavior is, we know that all it takes to stop the flow of metaphysical night soil are a few well-placed Tomahawk cruise missiles.