THOR'S RELIGIOUS IMPLICATIONS

A meeting of the Avengers at Avengers' mansion. CAPTAIN AMERICA, IRON MAN, THOR, GIANT MAN, WASP and SCARLET WITCH are there, maybe others. Ask Brett White.

CAPTAIN AMERICA

So if we follow those plans then we should be able to catch Baron Zemo.

The other Avengers murmur in agreement.

IRON MAN

I have a question.

CAPTAIN AMERICA

Yes, Iron Man?

IRON MAN

Is Thor really the Norse god of Thunder?

THOR looks up from the table; he had not been paying attention.

THOR

Excuse me?

CAPTAIN AMERICA

That is true: Thor is the Norse god of thunder.

IRON MAN

Doesn't that have serious religious implications? One of the major religions/mythologies of the world was correct.

THOR

I'm right here.

CAPTAIN AMERICA

That's true, his presence does imply that the Norse religion is the true one.

IRON MAN

I'd say it does more than imply it, it straight-up proves it. Plus there's no other gods walking around --- you don't see Matthew, Mark, Luke or John in the Fantastic Four.

WASP

Hercules exists.

IRON MAN

Oh yeah! So weird!

THOR

Why won't you guys talk to me?

CAPTAIN AMERICA

Honestly I've never thought about it. IN a weird way, Thor's existence kinda made me disregard the Norse religion -- as if the existence of a superhero version of one of their gods made the whole philosophy seem sillier.

IRON MAN

That's how I've thought of it too, but when you take a step back having Thor on your team is like having Buddha in your neighborhood watch program.

WASP

Kind of.

IRON MAN

Well, you see my point.

THOR

Hello?

CAPTAIN AMERICA

The really weird thing is we see Thor lose all the time. He both validates and undermines the Norse religion by existing.

IRON MAN

Hah hah! So true!

WASP

Weird!

THOR

LISTEN TO ME!

CAPTAIN AMERICA

What?

THOR

I am not the real Norse god, there is no norse religion. I'm just a superhero.

WASP

How about Odin? Balder the Brave? The rainbow bridge? Asgard?

THOR

All superhero stuff, no religion stuff. I wouldn't get that heavy.

IRON MAN

What do you do on the weekends?

THOR

I play in a Kinks cover band.

BLACKOUT