YOU LIKE ALL THE SONGS

ELAINE, a RECEPTIONIST is at a desk. Her co-worker CHAD approaches.

CHAD

Hey, Elaine, could I have my paycheck?

ELAINE shuffled around the desk and then finds it.

ELAINE

Uh yes, yes... Here it is. Uh, did you see Alphas last night?

CHAD

I did, actually. Yeah.

ELAINE

What'd you think of it?

CHAD

It was okay, I guess. I liked last week better.

ELAINE retracts the paycheck so it's visible but out of reach.

ELAINE

Oh no. No. No you like all the episodes.

CHAD

(confused)

No.... No.I thought it was just okay.

ELAINE

No. It's your favorite show.

She clears her throat, taps his paycheck on the desk in front of her.

CHAD

(resignedly)

Ok. I like all the episodes of Alphas.

ELAINE

What do you think of this song that's playing?

You can hear "Still The One" playing from ELAINE'S laptop.

CHAD

This Shania Twain song? I don't like it.

ELAINE

No! You love this song. It's your favorite song.

CHAD

Okay. I love this song.

ELAINE

And the album? What do you think of the album?

CHAD

I don't know any Shania Twain albums.

ELAINE

But this one's your favorite.

CHAD

(considers, then agrees)

Yes, this is my favorite Shania Twain album.

ELAINE

What's your favorite song on this Shania Twain album?

CHAD

This one is.

ELAINE

No! You like all the songs.. (slaps paycheck against desk) equally!

CHAD

Okay, fine. I do. Could I have my paycheck please?

ELAINE

Yeah, sure! (she does not give it over) What's your favorite inert gas?

CHAD

I don't know.

ELAINE

(as if this was obvious)

Argon.

CHAD

Okay.

ELAINE

Say it.

CHAD

Argon. (realizes she wants more) Argon is my...

ELAINE

Favorite!

CHAD

...favorite inert gas.

ELAINE

Will you say that altogether?

CHAD

Argon is my favorite inert gas.

ELAINE

Okay good.

CHAD stares at ELAINE in frustration.

ELAINE

What... do... you think of me?

CHAD

I'm sorry?

ELAINE

Like your opinion of me. What's your opinion of me?

CHAD

(through gritted teeth)

You're my favorite person.

ELAINE waves him on with the paycheck -- she wants more.

CHAD

...of ALL people. You're my favorite person of all people.

ELAINE

Will you say my name?

CHAD

Elaine Rogers is my favorite person...

ELAINE

Margaret is my middle name, could you say that?

CHAD

Elaine Margaret Rogers is my favorite person of all people.

ELAINE

Yes. Good.

ELAINE hands CHAD the paycheck.

CHAD

I'm sorry I never called you.

ELAINE

I know.

(OUT)